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Meta
Category Archives: Journal
1995: Sullen Angry 8-yr-old
From my journal for November 28, 1995 Well, let’s see if she is here, that sullen angry hurt child. I have a hit of her age as being 8 or 9, and of Mother as a hurt angry sullen child … Continue reading
Posted in Activism, Healing, Journal, Somatic Experiencing, Work with parts
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“I gave my life energy to sacred meaning”
From my journal for October 18 Feeling weird. Woke up feeling weird. Not sure I can describe it. I don’t think I have a fever, I found my thermometer, but will have to wait, because I already had a drink. At the thought … Continue reading
Posted in Circle Dance, Healing, Journal, Present Day, Spirit, Vocation
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1995: Struggle to Find Compassion for Myself
November 24, 1995 I’m sitting outside the Dojo in Montpelier while Dana teaches class. I came with him because I wanted to go to the Psychodrama performance “Surviving through the Night.” Someone gave me the flyer when we had the … Continue reading
1995: Trying to Pretend I’m “Normal”
From my journal for November 21, 1995 No headache this morning, just the despair. The headache would have been manageable without the despair, I’ve lived through worse, but last night the two together were too much. I see that the … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Journal, Trauma
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1995: “Holding the Space”
From my journal for November 30, 1995 Eleanor said yesterday that she could feel me “holding the space” at Hart’s and she thanked me for the amount of energy I was pouring out in her direction. It surprised me, because … Continue reading
1995: Struggle with Issues Around Medication
From my journal for November 19, 1995 I’m afraid I’m not keeping up with my discipline around sleeping. I think I’ve dropped my discipline because I see Dr. Stoll in a couple of days, and I’m hoping for a magic … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Journal
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1995: The Importance of Heart and Soul
From my journal for November 17, 1995. By this time I am regularly questioning why I keep writing. I am typing up roughly a year later, and sometime next year I stop typing completely. I thought I might stop writing, … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Journal, Trauma
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1995: Exploring the Bottom
This is a continuation of the post from September 13, called Moving Along the Bottom. The journal entries are also from November 1995 Work with Karen. Exploring the bottom. Lying on the bed I’m aware of a featureless waste, a … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Journal
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Yet Another Young Part
From my journal for Wednesday, September 13 3rd cup. coffee. Feeling very odd. I’m finding it extremely hard to stay present. I had been walking Mocha for a little while when I realized I had been thinking, not paying … Continue reading
Posted in Journal, Present Day, Trauma
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1995: “Happiness is a Choice?”
From my journal for Sept 5,1995 Reading the new version of Son-Rise — a friend offered it to me because of their practice of radical acceptance of their autistic son — I find myself very angry at the exposition of … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Journal, Trauma
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