Monthly Archives: December 2020

Winter Solstice

These readings came my way. Susan Cooper, The Shortest Day (Written for the Christmas Revels) So the shortest day came and the year died And everywhere down the centuries of the snow white world Came people singing, dancing, to drive … Continue reading

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Something Totally New

I’ve been reading Thomas Zinser’s book Soul-Centered Healing.  While I drank my coffee and read the Chapter called The Quickening, Mocha started squeaking.  I was determined to finish my coffee and the Chapter before I took her out, but her … Continue reading

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How this Blog helps me Keep on Keeping on

From my journal written in September 2010, and posted in April 2012 as Struggle with Self-Hate I cooked rice but I wasn’t able to eat breakfast.  Called Karen.  She said not to “shame & blame” myself, but of course I’m … Continue reading

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Collapse of a Coping Strategy

This was originally posted in March 2012 (journal entry written in June 2004) Day started badly.  Found bank deposit that I prepared before I left for Kripalu & forgot.   I feel out of control.  This scares me because it looks … Continue reading

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Needing to be Heard

This was originally posted in March 2012 (journal entry from June 2004) A really bad night.  Dogs barking, didn’t call cops.  My heart just ached.  I tried to bring compassion to it without success.  It’s slap in my face how … Continue reading

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Soul Medicine

from my journal for Wednesday, December 9 The talk with Erica turned everything around again.  My energy was so much better for the rest of the day.  My life has not been a chore, but a battle.  A battle against … Continue reading

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The Narcissist

from my journal for July 13, 1992 More realizations have crystallized out of my experience of V last week. One is how the narcissist is hollow, all surface, for all the self involvement, there isn’t any “self” there.  I went … Continue reading

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A Place of Strength

from my journal for July 10, 1992 Since I’m planning to take a break from therapy for about six weeks, we talked about issues of separation from Mother.  I told Karen about V, and how I was not at all … Continue reading

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Unconscious Cruelty

from my journal for July 8, 1992 written the day after writers group with Lynn & her mother V Gosh what a cannibal V is, what a horrid woman.  And in some ways just like my mother.  So nice on the … Continue reading

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Defeated by Greater and Greater Beings

First there was trauma, followed by PTSD, before my brain and nervous system matured. Then lack of mirroring and mis-representation by a narcissistic mother. Then the usual damage by Alcoholic parents. Then being a Highly Sensitive Person in a toxic … Continue reading

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