Monthly Archives: December 2015

Triggered

I started reading Invisible Heroes, the book on trauma survivors by Belleruth Naparstek, because it often helps me.  But this morning I read a description of trauma that so accurately described how I feel when the baby is triggered, that … Continue reading

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The “Wonder Flower”

The “Wonder Flower” is a little booklet I made long ago.  I shall be endlessly grateful to my mother who saved it somewhere among her mementoes.  According to a friend who taught children’s art, I made it when I was … Continue reading

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It’s REALLY Not My Fault

Had another realization which had to do with really getting it that my depression is not my fault.  Somehow I’ve always assumed that because I couldn’t make it go away, I had to be “holding on” to it.  This is … Continue reading

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Grace is Always Coming Down

News flash!  I just saw that the Jenny Erica sees is big enough to hold the Jenny I experience, hold her with compassion, and tell her “You are OK just as you are.  You don’t have to “heal” or “be … Continue reading

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Struggle to Fit the Pieces Together

A good session with Erica.  I drove home feeling much better — a warmth in my belly — and did my best to savor it.  We talked about the child needing to see themselves in the gaze of a loving … Continue reading

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Depression and Suicide

I watched two TED talks today, one about depression and one about suicide.  Both spoke about how our culture has placed a stigma on both depression and suicide, which leaves people dealing with these things horribly isolated. Here are the … Continue reading

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My Work

[This is a very long post.  I’ve done my best to edit it, but I’ve also had to add explanatory material.  I’ve put in comments from the present, in square brackets and italics.  I think the length of it is … Continue reading

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Everything Doesn’t Happen for a Reason

A friend posted this on Facebook, Everything Doesn’t Happen for a Reason, and I was angry at first, because I don’t believe that things happen at random.  But as I read through the piece, the author was speaking about using … Continue reading

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Depression

From my journal for Thursday, December 3: Raining.  Bleak.  Nothing to look forward to.  A chill in my heart.  Bring compassion to my chilled heart.  Something stops me.  I stay frozen.  I put my arms around the frozen child.  She … Continue reading

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Kindred Spirits One-on-One

I went down to my friend (and Kindred Spirit) Teresa on Friday night.  We were intending to go on Saturday to a gathering which had had to be cancelled.  We found out at 10:00 after a lazy breakfast.   What … Continue reading

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