Category Archives: Trauma

The Traumatized Baby

This is a repost of something first posted in July 2010.  So amazing.  Here I am working with parts before I had any idea about the Internal Family Systems work. It’s also how I’ve been feeling this week: “I feel … Continue reading

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Trauma Survivors have Difficulty Experiencing Love

This is from Gretchen Schmelzer’s blog: For those of you who have been hurt or who grew up with trauma you may know the word love, but you may not understand what it means. Or maybe you understand what it … Continue reading

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Help from Inner Teacher

Written today. Looking back, I see that I’ve only written one post about the knee pain. Reading it reminds me that my early trauma can trigger me into feeling more helpless than I am. After one week of feeling considerably … Continue reading

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Victim Story

I read a piece on the CAC’s Daily Meditation.  It’s about the story of victimization.  Of course, a lot of people have had their lives made more difficult by various conditions, poverty, race, gender, etc. I see that the problem … Continue reading

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“I Choose to Trust…”

From my journal for September 1994 and first posted in December 2022: And finally I came to see (again again) that this miserable wimp is herself my task, this person who is so sensitive and precariously balanced, who can’t even … Continue reading

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Confusing, Difficult Time

I’ve been having a really hard confusing time. Excerpts from some relevant journal entries: Friday, January 26   … this odd realization.  Something to do with if God is in everything, then I “am” God, if god feels my pain then … Continue reading

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Grief that’s Unable to be Mourned Because the Loss is Not Recognized

From my journal for May 15, 1994, posted on April 23, 2022 I feel empty and heavy inside, back to the bombed-out house, carrying the burden of grief.  Standing on the sidelines, watching the enormous pageant of life-and-death — clouds, … Continue reading

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1996: Description of Very Early Trauma

From my journal for February 5, 1996 I’ve been trying to live as though I were going to die soon, and of course that brings me right back to the present moment, to being in the present as much as … Continue reading

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1996: Work with Conflicts

From my journal for February 5, 1996 I wanted to write down the number of conflicts I’ve been experiencing: MOVEMENT <—> STILLNESS     I know that exercise is important in combatting depression.  I’ve found that getting up and moving … Continue reading

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Early Trauma and Knee Pain

This blog is about living with PTSD, so what’s the point of writing about my sore knee?  I did a post about it on December 27, but then I thought it wasn’t directly relevant. It turns out that I am … Continue reading

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