Category Archives: Somatic Experiencing

(Written in August 2009) Session with Caryn. Told her about the visioning weekend and what people said and then shivered and yawned because it feel so scary to take that in. I told her about the book about attachment and … Continue reading →

(Written in July 2009) The session with Caryn was very low key. I cried, and had a little discharge. I told her about the difficulty with my right shoulder. She had me walk around with 3lb weights so I could … Continue reading →

(Written in May 2009) Session with Caryn. Seated in my corner, I immediately started to cry, and writhe, and rage. I had such a desire to push it all through and be done with it. Caryn stopped me after a … Continue reading →

(Written in May 2009) The session with Caryn started with me feeling my butt as very solid and heavy. I need the safety of this corner and Caryn’s physical presence to feel it so deeply. As I stayed with it … Continue reading →

(Written in February 2006) A good session with Peter. Dog barked in the hall and I started telling him about Paula whose dog barks at all hours of the night. I said I couldn’t call the cops on her then, … Continue reading →

Support May 2008
Told Kevin I needed S.E. work and he did a pretty good job. I talked about the feeling of being revved up that I’d had most of the weekend, & got reactivated by Kayla’s story of Jan getting stopped by the Border Patrol. So when I got to Kevin I was activated. I talked about what I was feeling, grabbed his fingers again for something solid to hang on to, talked about the family party and the babies and how the dads were involved and cried a lot. Finally we identified some inner infants — one who’s standing up and screaming “This is not OK,” and one who’s curled into a ball in the corner trying her best to disappear. He asked where the revved up feeling was — arms & shoulders, neck, and in front of my chest. He validated that that space in front of my chest is part of my body. I identified lots of tension in my neck & upper arms. Even allowing the scared & angry one to speak didn’t change the activation — what would help? A sudden vision of a protest march with banners & signs — I’m not alone! I’m not alone! Someone else cares enough to take action. Kevin asked where in my body did I not feel the activation. I was sitting cross legged on the table & felt my butt & thighs & that part of me felt soft & juicy & red & melting down onto the table. It felt so good I just stayed with it — yes, this is how a resource is supposed to work. Then my head & body wanted to fall forward, needed support, so we piled up the pillows again. This time it was a much more improvisational process. I’d keep looking up and talking and then putting my head down again and Kevin would insert pillows or folded cloth under my hands or elbows and I’d relax for a bit and then either feel some new discomfort, or have some bit of information bubble up to be expressed. Kevin talked about the importance of support — detailed, particular, accurate support — and it became really clear to me how little support I’ve experienced in my life.

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(Written in January 2005) The work I did with Brad was frustrating — I felt like I “hadn’t gotten anywhere”, but he thought it was good and when I told Eleanor, she thought it was good too.  Basically I started … Continue reading →