Category Archives: Trauma

My Work

Posted on December 18, 2015 by jenny

[This is a very long post.  I’ve done my best to edit it, but I’ve also had to add explanatory material.  I’ve put in comments from the present, in square brackets and italics.  I think the length of it is … Continue reading →

Posted in Depression, Journal, Present Day, Trauma | Comments Off on My Work

Ongoing Struggle

Posted on November 26, 2015 by jenny

Went down to see Barbara.  She was depressed too.  We took the dogs for a walk.  We watched Bernie’s speech to Liberty University.  It was heartening. When I came home I got sucked into the parenting book.  Couldn’t stop reading, … Continue reading →

Posted in Depression, Trauma, Writing | Comments Off on Ongoing Struggle

Parenting from the Inside Out

Posted on November 20, 2015 by jenny

Started reading “Parenting from the Inside Out.”  It’s about interactions between parents and children, and that if the parents have unprocessed events in their lives, it will affect their ability to raise healthy kids.  They talk about how relationships are … Continue reading →

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Refuge

Posted on November 18, 2015 by jenny

Reading “Necessary as Blood.”  Reading doesn’t seem to help, I still feel the cold weight in my chest. “… home to me was certainly never anything remotely material.  It consisted, I have decided, in something I sensed as refuge: an … Continue reading →

Posted in Present Day, Trauma | Comments Off on Refuge

Lost in an Indifferent Universe

Posted on November 18, 2015 by jenny

Woke up this morning feeling lost in  an indifferent universe.  There is no God or spirit or meaning here.  I’ve been reading The Shack over the last few days.  I’ve read it several times.  I don’t like the Christian correctness … Continue reading →

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Beautiful Broken Things

Posted on November 17, 2015 by jenny

I found this piece on my friend Eve’s altar.  It really spoke to me.  In California, before I understood what had happened to me, I called these breakings “Shipwreck.”  I did not see these times as times of recovery and … Continue reading →

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Struggle to Find the Support I Need

Posted on November 14, 2015 by jenny

From my journal for October 10 Had trouble going to sleep & woke early.  Lying there, counting my breaths, I had a momentary qualm “what is the point of my life?”  I realize I usually ask it intellectually, when it’s … Continue reading →

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Bleak. Discouraged.

Posted on October 5, 2015 by jenny

Monday, October 5 Bleak.  Very discouraged.  Got up to shit. To tired to make tea.  Went back to bed, but totally unable to think of anything that would make me feel better. Enjoying my life is not important.  Doing something … Continue reading →

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Fear

Posted on August 20, 2015 by jenny

July 18 Erica said I needed to reassure the baby that it was OK to be scared, but I also needed to contact the ones who don’t want to be scared.  One of those is upset because she doesn’t know … Continue reading →

Posted in Healing, Journal, Trauma, Work with parts | Comments Off on Fear

To Write Love On Her Arms

Posted on August 14, 2015 by jenny

Friday, August 14 I went to the Co-op in Montpelier hoping to get blueberries.  No blueberries!  what a disappointment!  And a little scary.  What happened to the blueberry crop? I was on my way to see my therapist Karen.  I … Continue reading →

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