Category Archives: Breakdown

The Narcissist’s Insults, Translated

Posted on March 16, 2025 by jenny

My sister sent me this, and I think it’s brilliant.  It certainly describes my experience with Mother, and why it took me so long to recognize my positive gifts. When a malignant narcissist attempts to insult you, it’s in reality … Continue reading →

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My Trauma is Triggered by Being Alone Too Much

Posted on November 24, 2024 by jenny

I’m finally feeling more together and coherent.  I had moved to the health center because my trauma had been triggered, and I had pretty completely fallen apart.  The notebook about that is still in my apartment, so I don’t have … Continue reading →

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1996: Enneagram 4, Difficult Winter, Individuation Process

Posted on July 15, 2024 by jenny

From my journal for May 8, 1996 Woke early.  I have angry rejoinders to my brother going through my head, so thought I would just write them down.  Actually, I think he did me a service with his stupid, patronizing, … Continue reading →

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Lost, Discouraged, without Resources or Support

Posted on May 11, 2024 by jenny

I have been having a very hard time because I haven’t been able to sleep unless I take a drug, which I’ve now taken for almost a month, and shouldn’t take for very long.  But if I don’t take it, … Continue reading →

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1996: Early Thoughts on “Trauma”

Posted on December 26, 2023 by jenny

From my journal for January 10, 1996 Visit to Hart, the naturopath.  I told her that I was struggling with depression. …  We talked about suicide a little, I said I felt even about that “it won’t do any good.”  … Continue reading →

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Empty Cold Place

Posted on December 20, 2021 by jenny

from my journal for October 24 2021 Checking email, I saw something about how corporate interests are acting against the freedom of the internet.  I could feel the “bad guys” closing in, and it reminded me of Etty Hillesum as … Continue reading →

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Angry One

Posted on June 24, 2021 by jenny

Feeling desperately scared the morning of June 22, I found it really hard even to go through my well-practiced routine of cooking breakfast.  As soon as I finished breakfast and walked Mocha, I went down to the Clinic to see … Continue reading →

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Anatomy of a Breakdown

Posted on January 20, 2020 by jenny

I’ve been reading through my blog from the very beginning.  I am once again in the 12 year cycle, at a time when Jupiter in the sky is opposed Jupiter’s position when I was born.  Ever since 1972 I have … Continue reading →

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Guidance from August 2008

Posted on January 18, 2020 by jenny

(Written in August 2008 and originally posted on March 16, 2010) Dear Guides and Guardian Spirits, it’s been a very stressful time, and I feel totally out of touch with Spirit.  Please help me. Dear Jenny, we love you.  Take … Continue reading →

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Two Whole Weeks of Terror, February 1971

Posted on July 25, 2019 by jenny

from my journal.  entries are undated.  A lot of this is in a post from January 2016 how calmly does the olive branch observe the sky begin to blanch without a cry, without a prayer with no betrayal of despair…  … Continue reading →

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