Category Archives: Present Day

Emptiness

Posted on January 9, 2014 by jenny

I haven’t been able to post anything for quite a while.  Bella’s death opened up the huge abyss of abandonment. The session with Caryn was tough.  I started in my corner and crying.  I wanted to ask her what was … Continue reading →

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Journal Work: Trying to Understand Myself

Posted on December 1, 2013 by jenny

Reading Rob Bell about Jesus:  “Over and over again we see him going to the edges, to the margins, to those in trouble, those despised, those no one else would touch, those who were ignored, the weak, the blind, the … Continue reading →

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God With Us

Posted on November 30, 2013 by jenny

Reading in Rob Bell last night and this morning how God is with us in our pain, feeling our pain.  I remember once, in a bad time, it occurred to me that Jesus knew what it was like to be … Continue reading →

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When We Talk About God

Posted on November 27, 2013 by jenny

Rob Bell:  What We Talk about When We Talk About God This book was given to me by my recovering alcoholic brother, who has just done an extraordinary thing by turning his life completely around.  What he’s done is so … Continue reading →

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Finding Support in Unlikely Places

Posted on November 20, 2013 by jenny

I’ve been sick for a couple of days.  Headache and ache all over.  This flu announced itself by two days of bottom of the pit depression.  Friends would try to cheer me up and I would just cry.  I spent … Continue reading →

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Still Struggling

Posted on November 12, 2013 by jenny

(Written in Hunger Mountain Co-op in Montpelier, before I see Karen for a therapy appointment) Still struggling with depression.  Mostly OK as I drove over, but it’s a grim grey day.  I realized I don’t see any people, I see … Continue reading →

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Taking Care of Myself IS my God-given Task

Posted on October 31, 2013 by jenny

For about the last five days I’ve been pretty bummed out and discouraged with myself for being stuck in depression.  Lynelle was able to help me shift it.  She told me that taking care of myself is my first priority.  … Continue reading →

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The Down Side of “Pushing” Myself

Posted on October 23, 2013 by jenny

This morning I just didn’t want to go on.  I felt bad about dumping my negativity on my good friend Elizabeth — we always talk on Tuesday morning, and she has been a tremendous support for me — in spite … Continue reading →

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What’s the Point of Going On?

Posted on October 21, 2013 by jenny

I haven’t posted much to the blog in a long time.  Bella’s dying and death were difficult and full of conflict, complicated by the older traumas they triggered.  It was hard to write when I was depressed.  A lot of … Continue reading →

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Faith

Posted on October 8, 2013 by jenny

Barry’s sermon last Sunday was about “faith,” if you had faith the size of a mustard seed you could move mountains.  Someone in the choir spoke up, saying she agreed, maybe she even said having faith is easy?  simple?  Anyway … Continue reading →

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