Something Totally New

I’ve been reading Thomas Zinser’s book Soul-Centered Healing.  While I drank my coffee and read the Chapter called The Quickening, Mocha started squeaking.  I was determined to finish my coffee and the Chapter before I took her out, but her squeaking was slowing me down.  Generally, she only keeps squeaking like that if she has diarrhea.  As I write, I wonder if Mother was trying to stop me from reading the Chapter.

Zinser talks about different manifestations of spirit, such as Earthbound Spirits who are people who don’t realize they have died and wander around confused, and “attached” spirits who are people who have attached themselves to people living now.  Usually these beings are causing trouble for someone who comes for therapy, even if that isn’t their intention.  Zinser talks about having to convince the Earthbound Ones that they need to go to the Light.   Often, they know exactly what the Light is, and with gladness and relief, make the choice and leave this world for the next.  But sometimes they refuse to do that, usually because they believe that the Light will judge them instead of welcoming them.  Zinser says you have to speak to these ones very firmly, try to convince them that they won’t be judged, but sometimes you just have to close the door.  Usually he does the speaking, but because of my experience with contacting and bringing back various Little Jennys, it seemed easy and obvious to talk to Mom myself.  Another suggestion was to remind them that there might be someone who has passed on who would be able to help them.

from my journal for yesterday:
So when I was coming back with Mocha, I started talking to Mom.  I told her she had to go toward the Light, that I can’t do it for her.  That I had tried, but it’s not possible to do the inner work for someone else.  I told her that if she was jealous of someone else, it didn’t do any good to try to destroy what they had.  If she wants it, she has to do the work. 

Sitting here writing, I have a sense that she’s afraid of God’s judgement.  I tell her God isn’t like that.  But of course she probably had some awful childhood experience, maybe she was even traumatized, and learned that God was punitive.  So then I told her to ask Mama Greene for help, Mama Greene loved her.  I said it more than once, with force.  Imagined turning her around and giving her a little shove.  Saw Mama Greene appear in the distance, arms open.

I hope that will help.

The first signs that something may have happened: I slept well last night, despite a nap in the afternoon, I enjoyed walking with Dulany & the dogs around the plowed road in Rivercrest, and I felt held in a field of love in Quaker Meeting this morning, which is something I’ve never felt.  Energetic connection, yes, but loved? Something totally new.

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