Guidance

(Written in December 2010)
Dear Guides & Guardians, I’m feeling a little blue.
    There, there, Little Jenny, it’s right to mourn that so much of your life’s energy was wasted — at first just trying to survive, then trying unsuccessfully to heal from wounds that were deeper and more complex than you had any idea of.  It’s right to mourn that so much of your creative energy went into starting projects that never got finished — not because you are lazy, or unable to persist — but because you got derailed by PTSD.  But you did in fact push through on a number of projects: your book, Neskaya, your house.  And you have done major healing of your wounds.  Dear Little Jenny, I’m so grateful for your creativity and persistence.  Though it’s right to mourn that so much got lost along the way, it’s important to remember that the main purpose of your life is healing and you have been doing that.  Your creative projects are part of your healing process.  The many things that did not get finished are like the seeds that get scattered and never sprout.  The energy that created them is not wasted.