Category Archives: Trauma

“Journey” Poetry

Posted on February 15, 2013 by jenny

Prisoners of War The experts are now saying that those of us who grew up in alcoholic and abusive families have lived with a level of stress that is equivalent to that of prisoner of war.   We are prisoners … Continue reading →

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The “Social Engagement System”

Posted on October 24, 2012 by jenny

“The more primitive the operating system, the more power it has to take over the overall function of the organism.  It does this by inhibiting the more recent and more refined neurological subsystems.  In particular, the immobilization system all but … Continue reading →

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Embodied Female Presence

Posted on October 17, 2012 by jenny

Written in March 2011 Eleanor came over last night.  We had a good visit.  She’s been terrified for days and unable to sleep much.  I wish I could do more for her.  I suppose it could be her terror I … Continue reading →

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September 1995: What it’s like to suffer from PTSD, when you don’t know that’s what it is.

Posted on September 26, 2012 by jenny

(Written in September 1995) It’s grey and damp outside.  Yesterday when it was grey, I hoped that would stop the planes, but they flew anyway.  They weren’t loud but they were frequent, and I’m pretty much ground down by it … Continue reading →

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September 1998: The Story You “Haven’t Told Yet”, the WHOLE story

Posted on September 25, 2012 by jenny

Another gem from converting old journals.  This must have been written after the retreat with Deena Metzger.  A lot of the writing was done in the retreat, but some of it was done elsewhere.  It’s a different way of looking … Continue reading →

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May 1995: Airplane Pollution

Posted on September 15, 2012 by jenny

(Written May 2, 1995) There’s been a damn airplane snarling out there while I’m writing.  I hate to have a lovely fresh morning, 8AM, sunshine, greening grass, spoiled by that continuous grind at the edge of hearing.  Sigh.  I am … Continue reading →

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July 1994: No Enemies Within

Posted on September 3, 2012 by jenny

From No Enemies Within, the story of Norma, whose wounded self made signs while her verbal self rattled on about past abandonments and failed to see present support.  “I care about you.  I’m curious about you.  We’re not done yet.  … Continue reading →

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Totally Bleak

Posted on August 20, 2012 by jenny

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008) At least I slept.  Feeling totally bleak this morning.  It was so painful yesterday, not to be able to feel any softening in my heart as I heard people’s stories of compassion, not … Continue reading →

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Connecting with Others

Posted on August 18, 2012 by jenny

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008) Long talk with Patty who sits next to me and was my walking and breathing partner. She was the youngest of 6 in a severely disfunctional family.  She can remember what happened, but … Continue reading →

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We’re All a Bit Battered

Posted on August 16, 2012 by jenny

(Written in December 2008, at Kripalu) Dreamed of trying to maneuver a car in a snowy rutted gouged lot.  There was barely space between two cars with a deep erosion ditch.  I may have hit some of the other cars … Continue reading →

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