I wrote this recently in a writing group:
I was named Jean for my mother, but they called me “Jenny” to differentiate me from my mother who was called “Pidge.” I was told that “Jenny” had come from a great-great grandmother named Jenny Murdoch. She was a Scot, and my middle name “Davidson” is a clan whose territory was around Inverness. The story is told of Jenny Murdoch, when she came over on the boat from Scotland, there was a terrible storm. She was down in steerage, and she came up on deck saying “If I mus’ dee, let me not dee in darkness.” I have a picture of a young woman in clothing from the 19th Century, sitting proudly. I don’t remember being told who she was, but I have identified her with Jenny Murdoch, and I take her cry as my motto. I have lived most of my life in severe depression. I didn’t know, until I got on medication, that I had never had normal brain chemistry. One of the things that kept me going through nearly 60 years was the determination that I would not die depressed.
