Category Archives: Present Day

Hope for the Future

Posted on October 24, 2011 by jenny

I’ve been reading a book called “The Better Angels of Our Nature; why violence has declined.”   His argument is based on statistics from the 1400’s to the present, and his argument is impressive.   I’m a little over a third … Continue reading →

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Imaginal Cells

Posted on October 19, 2011 by jenny

How does the caterpillar become a butterfly?  The actual process is not as simple as I once imagined it: sort of like those computer techniques that can morph a woman into a lion and then a bird just by lengthening … Continue reading →

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Trying to Connect with God, Revisited

Posted on October 8, 2011 by jenny

Got a comment on my post called “Trying to Connect with God” which was posted November 28, 2010.  I was really inspired to reply, I’ve been on the same path, struggling to make sense of a god who apparently allows … Continue reading →

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Finding the Will to Live

Posted on October 2, 2011 by jenny

A couple of days ago I posted something from August about “no will to live,” and my struggles with it, trying to understand why it’s so hard to take in positive feedback.  Looking back from a month’s perspective, and after … Continue reading →

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“Demoralization Box”

Posted on September 26, 2011 by jenny

For the last couple of months I’ve been struggling with “lost the will to live” — the last stage of trauma when the organism has concluded that death is inevitable.  Sometimes I’m OK with it, sometimes it’s really hard.  I’m … Continue reading →

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Dancing in the Streets

Posted on September 8, 2011 by jenny

Yesterday I was so bummed out about Obama failing to veto the Tar Sands Bill and allowing the gutting of the Clean Air standards, that I just wanted to give up on politics.  So I called my friend Beverly, whose … Continue reading →

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A Letter from God

Posted on August 26, 2011 by jenny

For a while now I’ve been hanging out with “lost the will to live.”  Paying attention to the feelings but not acting on them.  I notice that I don’t have a lot of energy, and it’s hard to summon up … Continue reading →

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The Collapse Phase

Posted on August 12, 2011 by jenny

Written yesterday Hard to get out of bed.  Feeling — not exactly depressed — but some sense of no future, or of getting through the day being a chore.  Lonely?  I know I didn’t feel like this at Dance Camp.  … Continue reading →

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Hope

Posted on August 5, 2011 by jenny

I continue to be surprised that telling the truth about how I feel and sharing it results in me feeling a lot better.   Once I wrote a letter to my brother about how depressed I was feeling and the same … Continue reading →

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Depression/Demoralization

Posted on August 4, 2011 by jenny

I was pretty much in low-grade fear all day yesterday.  I was able to cry a little, sitting with Eleanor.   I can feel a pain and coldness in my heart right now.    My heart really aches.  I feel sad and … Continue reading →

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