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Meta
Category Archives: Present Day
Letting Things Happen
Journal entries: Friday, October 19 It’s almost 7:30. I’ve been too leisurely over my tea. I think I will wait and see when I finish my routine and that will decide whether I drive down to Keene or not. I got back from … Continue reading
Posted in Journal, Present Day
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Attachment Trauma
I usually type up my journal a month later. Yesterday I typed this. One of the things I’ve been learning in the work with Erica is how deep the trauma goes. This description of feeling so alone and disconnected is … Continue reading
Posted in Journal, Present Day, Trauma
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Running on Fumes
From my journal for September 26 I was so tired yesterday I didn’t do much of anything. I did take a short nap, went to meditation, walked Mocha in the rain. I had planned to do things like call the … Continue reading
Posted in Journal, Present Day, Trauma
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Reframe
more from my journal for Tuesday, October 16 I read some more in Krista Tippett’s book. It is so amazing. A lot of it feels totally beyond my poor brain at the moment. Maybe because so much of it is … Continue reading
Posted in Journal, Present Day, Trauma
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Good for me!
I typed all that up and made a draft of a blog post. It took me all day. I added a part about early trauma affecting the development of the brain, how that makes it harder to heal. When I … Continue reading
Posted in Journal, Present Day, Trauma
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Struggle with Feelings of Failure
from my journal for Monday, October 15 I am having a really hard time. I had planned to pick up my meds between 8-9AM. I got up at 7, so tired, so hard to get out of bed. Did usual … Continue reading
Posted in Journal, Present Day, Trauma
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“I cried and cried and nobody came…”
I finally figured out why I have been so triggered. I was molested by my father at age 12 and raped by a date at age 17. I never told anyone, until very recently, and I’ve never had anyone tell … Continue reading
Posted in Present Day, Trauma
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Fighting Against Being a Triggered Basket Case
I’m having a really hard time today. I watched part of a video of “Man Enough” — I think the men who are speaking, about their own complicity in abuse of women, are great. But there were also clips from … Continue reading
Posted in Present Day, Spirit, Trauma
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Gaslighting
Noticing how badly I am doing — on Monday, struggling to deal with practical matters, I wrote this in my journal: Right now I’m feeling totally blank, like my brain is full of kapok. The angry phone messages from B … Continue reading
Posted in Present Day, Trauma
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Badly Triggered
I was badly triggered by all the news about Kavanaugh and the abuse that was being denied. Saturday I talked to someone I have a business relationship with, and she told me something that involved a dear friend, something about … Continue reading
Posted in Activism, Present Day, Trauma
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