{"id":7448,"date":"2022-09-03T09:12:07","date_gmt":"2022-09-03T13:12:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/?p=7448"},"modified":"2022-09-03T09:12:07","modified_gmt":"2022-09-03T13:12:07","slug":"being-nobody","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/?p=7448","title":{"rendered":"“Being Nobody”"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was reading Oneing\/Unveiled<\/a> while eating breakfast and came on something that struck me in Mirabai Starr.\u00a0 <\/span>She was diagnosed with a melanoma that turned out to be relatively easy to take care of.\u00a0 <\/span>She was warned to stop doing things and take care of herself so she cancelled all engagements.\u00a0 <\/span>But then she had to look at her life.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cIf I was not writing, who was I?\u00a0 <\/span>If I was not teaching workshops and speaking on podcasts, taking up the mic across multiple stages, what use was I?\u201d p85<\/p>\n

\u201cFor the first time since I was in my twenties, I bought a blank book and began writing and drawing again, without an agenda, filling the pages with color and curves, with poetry and dreams.\u00a0 <\/span>I listened to music and dozed in the dappled sunlight.\u00a0 <\/span>I let my old identities drop from my shoulders and watched them go, any impulse toward anxiety soon outmatched by calm curiosity. \u00a0 <\/span>…\u00a0 <\/span>I experimented with being nobody. …\u00a0I liked it.\u201d \u00a0 <\/span>p86<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

There were a number of things I wanted to do, like the mapping project of Jeddah Mali<\/a>, so that I could help us humans to make the transition to the new\/old paradigm \u2014 we are all connected, we need to live sustainably, etc. \u2014 but they\u2019ve all become impossible.\u00a0 <\/span>Even grief group where I occasionally said something helpful. But grief group has ended because the facilitators both got full time jobs.\u00a0 <\/span>\u201cI write, I type, I post.\u201d\u00a0 <\/span>I do these things because I can\u2019t not<\/span> do them.\u00a0 <\/span>But lately, my brain has not been working well<\/a> enough to do a post.\u00a0 <\/span>If I can\u2019t do that, what\u2019s the point of continuing to write and type?\u00a0 <\/span>If I can\u2019t post, who am I?<\/p>\n

I’ve accepted that I can’t do the program to help my Thyroid perfectly, am doing as much as I can. But I don’t exercise enough, I manage generally to drink enough, I don’t eat enough salt.<\/p>\n

Actually I realize it doesn’t matter. If it’s God\/Universe’s will, I will get better, if not, not. \u00a0I also realized, today, walking Mocha, that it’s not my job to figure out what I can do to help the paradigm shift. \u00a0It’s my job to wait and be open to what God\/Universe calls me to do. \u00a0“They also serve who only stand and wait<\/a>.” Sign written in the lighting cage at Wellesley, where I spent a lot of time, doing lighting for plays.<\/p>\n

Hey! \u00a0I did a post yesterday and one today!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I was reading Oneing\/Unveiled while eating breakfast and came on something that struck me in Mirabai Starr.\u00a0 She was diagnosed with a melanoma that turned out to be relatively easy to take care of.\u00a0 She was warned to stop doing … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7448","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-present-day","category-story"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7448","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7448"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7448\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7448"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7448"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7448"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}