Sunday, July 21<\/p>\n
3rd cup of tea: I am feeling terror and despair.\u00a0 <\/span>I am feeling the feelings of all the challenged beings, children separated from their parents, people held in jail who can\u2019t post bail, people wrongly defrauded of their right to vote, elephants, whales, bees, butterflies\u00a0 <\/span>\u2014 a baby bird fluttering its wings on my feeder pole \u2014 sorrow and pain for the beautiful, diverse, complex, healthy life support system, created over aeons on our planet, that we humans are destroying in our greed \u2014 and fear possibly \u2014 people who can see no higher value than money.\u00a0 <\/span>People who don\u2019t care what kind of a world their children and grandchildren will inherit \u2014 maybe they think that money will protect their offspring from the consequences of global warming.\u00a0 <\/span>Maybe the best thing to do is commit suicide by nuclear holocaust.\u00a0 <\/span>Then the earth will have time to repair our ravages.\u00a0 <\/span>Maybe there will be a few people left, a community who knows how to live sustainably.\u00a0 <\/span>It we don\u2019t crash fast, our slow crash may take too many species with it for the earth to regenerate.<\/p>\n [Added: The baby bird on my feeder pole is a message from the universe, that life goes on.]<\/p>\n Usually when I have felt despair and terror in the past, it\u2019s been darkened by depression, and I thought it was all about me.\u00a0 <\/span>Now I know that it\u2019s not about me at all.\u00a0 <\/span>Except insofar as I feel helpless to do anything.\u00a0 <\/span>I just opened some containers of supplements \u2014 they are wrapped in one-use plastic which is clogging our oceans.\u00a0 <\/span>I could give up the supplements, I don\u2019t know that they are really doing any good.\u00a0 <\/span>I\u2019m tempted to stop eating, but I can\u2019t do that to Mocha.<\/p>\n I\u2019m reading The Secret Garden<\/a>, hoping it will strengthen my soul.\u00a0 <\/span>I read something \u2014 on Brainpickings<\/a> \u2014 Stephen Hawking talking about \u201cGod\u201d and how the universe started from nothing with a Big Bang.\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s laughable.\u00a0 <\/span>He doesn\u2019t see the amazing universe<\/a>\u00a0that I see, built on self-organization<\/a>.\u00a0 <\/span>He doesn\u2019t get that what we call the \u201claws\u201d of physics probably don\u2019t hold true throughout time and space.\u00a0 <\/span>That is an assumption<\/span>, not something proven.\u00a0 <\/span>He may be brilliant, but his universe is cold and meaningless.\u00a0 <\/span>What gives it warmth and meaning is life, and life is Spirit<\/a> moving through everything.\u00a0 <\/span>Does that Spirit care about my welfare?\u00a0 <\/span>What I feel is Spirit, wanting to get in, aware of my heart closed in terror, understanding it, loving me anyway, and waiting patiently until I can feel the Goodness Beyond Goodness<\/a> again, and know that I am loved.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Sunday, July 21 3rd cup of tea: I am feeling terror and despair.\u00a0 I am feeling the feelings of all the challenged beings, children separated from their parents, people held in jail who can\u2019t post bail, people wrongly defrauded of … Continue reading