This is what I wrote the morning after I got home from California.\u00a0 I went to Commonweal, a retreat center in Bolinas, for a workshop with Francis Weller.\u00a0 We did a lot of writing, and reading out loud in a small group.\u00a0 There was drumming and movement and some wonderful songs and chants.\u00a0 Sunday afternoon we did a grief ritual, which was very intense.\u00a0 I will probably do a blog post about it.<\/p>\n
Home.\u00a0 Second cup of proper tea.\u00a0 Dog next to me.\u00a0 Of course now<\/span> I\u2019m on California time.\u00a0 Don\u2019t need to do anything but rest and digest.<\/p>\n
I did it!\u00a0 I did it!!\u00a0 I got myself out there and back and I was present for the whole workshop.<\/p>\n
I had a moment yesterday when I thought \u201cI didn\u2019t do anything at the workshop, I didn\u2019t get anywhere.\u201d\u00a0 Then I remember \u2014 that\u2019s how I felt after dance camp, too.\u00a0 The theme was \u201cchange\u201d and we did sequences of dances on that theme. \u00a0We also did exercises around what we needed to give up, what we wanted, what we intended. \u00a0 But I didn\u2019t feel like I had \u201cgotten anywhere.\u201d\u00a0 Well, as Francis would say, \u201cThat\u2019s not the point.\u201d\u00a0 I understand that I have set a process in motion and now I have to wait, without interfering, for it to work its intention into my life.\u00a0 The same is true of Dance Camp.\u00a0 I was disappointed afterward that \u201cnothing had happened.\u201d\u00a0 Then I comforted myself that most of the work is below consciousness.\u00a0 \u201cSeeing that a process has been set in motion,\u201d which I just saw today, is more than comforting, it\u2019s trusting the process.\u00a0 That I can put myself in the right place, open my mind and my heart, and wait.\u00a0 It\u2019s like planting a seed.\u00a0 I don\u2019t do the work of growing but I can create good conditions for the seed to grow.\u00a0 I remember Beverly saying: \u201cJenny, seeds want<\/span> to grow.\u201d\u00a0 I can till the soul (o my!) soil, aerate the compost, stir it up, let it cook.\u00a0 Tend the fire as Francis said Jung said.\u00a0 The work I did in the plane, \u201cI remember…\u201d was a good start.<\/p>\n
Do not<\/span> turn on the computer.\u00a0 Do not<\/span> check emails.\u00a0 Repeat not<\/span>.\u00a0 Enjoy your cup of real tea.\u00a0 Have some blueberries.\u00a0 Allow yourself to be welcomed back to New Hampshire, to your village, by blueberries, rabbits, bears, moose.\u00a0 By Mount Lafayette and Lafayette Brook, and the Gale River.\u00a0 By Mac\u2019s and Mojo\u2019s and the Hardware store.\u00a0 I was welcomed back by an incredible sunset behind Lafayette and Cannon, right in the Notch, and by Lynelle and Daria\u2019s note & blueberries, and by Pam and Mocha.\u00a0 By the puzzle and my journal.\u00a0 By blue stone fireplace and denim couches.\u00a0 Let yourself settle.\u00a0 Feast on your life.<\/p>\n
Yes.\u00a0 A process has been set in motion and I can let it carry me.\u00a0 \u201c… as the arrow endures the bow, to become in the gathering outleap something more than itself…\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
“Real tea” means tea made with water from my own well and soy milk.<\/p>\n
The last line is from Rilke\u2019s first Duino Elegy.\u00a0 I learned it from a fellow graduate.\u00a0 I don\u2019t know who did the translation.<\/p>\n
The injunctions \u201cDo not turn on the computer..\u201d come from a piece I did in Writers for Recovery<\/a>.<\/p>\n
\u201cFeast on your life<\/a>\u201d is from a poem I love, that Francis read to us.<\/p>\n
For more about Francis: \u00a0 YouTube talk<\/a>
\nHis website<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"This is what I wrote the morning after I got home from California.\u00a0 I went to Commonweal, a retreat center in Bolinas, for a workshop with Francis Weller.\u00a0 We did a lot of writing, and reading out loud in a … Continue reading