I posted the piece on the Red Woman yesterday.\u00a0 I realize that though I\u2019ve talked about her in my blog, I\u2019ve never told the whole story.\u00a0 I quote from my journal entry, in 1989, about her first appearance.\u00a0 Setting it out as a blog piece, I see that there\u2019s huge difference between how I wrote then, and how I write now.\u00a0 That passage now seems to me a little artificial, somewhat self-consciously literary.\u00a0 I was feeling ecstatic, that\u2019s true, and trying to express it on the page.\u00a0 There are parts like this in my earliest journal from my teenage years.\u00a0 I look back at my 47-year-old self and my 17-year-old self and feel a lot of affection.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve wondered about the time I said to my then husband, \u201cIf I published a book<\/a>, it would prove that I deserve to live despite the fact that my parents were disappointed in me,\u201d and then all the motivation for writing my journal fell out of my life.\u00a0 I stopped typing up my journals.\u00a0 I thought I might stop writing altogether, but I didn\u2019t, it was too much a part of my life.\u00a0 Now I see it as a spiritual practice.\u00a0 I\u2019ve wondered if my style of writing changed, and this seems to be an example.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad to see how I\u2019ve grown, as expressed in my writing, from then to now.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I posted the piece on the Red Woman yesterday.\u00a0 I realize that though I\u2019ve talked about her in my blog, I\u2019ve never told the whole story.\u00a0 I quote from my journal entry, in 1989, about her first appearance.\u00a0 Setting it … Continue reading