From the \u201cMimi\u201d journal.\u00a0 In my adolescence, I started writing a journal.\u00a0 I had read the Diary of Anne Frank, and copied her\u00a0idea of letters to an invisible friend.\u00a0 This was written in 1959 when I was 17.<\/p>\n
Thursday, 26 November<\/p>\n
Dear Mimi,<\/p>\n
Today is Thanksgiving Day, but I can’t think of anything to be thankful for.\u00a0 It’s awful to be so unhappy all the time.\u00a0 I feel constricted and grey in my chest and I feel as though I’ll never be happy again.\u00a0 I can’t even be thankful for a cherry colored sunset because even that thought does not open up my heart.\u00a0 I want to write poetry but I’m too discouraged, dried up inside, to do anything.\u00a0 Daddy says I’m unhappy because I want to be but I hate being miserable.\u00a0 I can’t figure out whether it’s because of Don or because I am utterly incapable of being normal and healthy and happy.\u00a0 Someday \u2014 I guess \u2014 but someday seems so far off.\u00a0 Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow creeps in this petty pace from day to day unto the last syllable of recorded time; and all our yesterdays light fools the way to dusty death.\u00a0 Out, out, brief candle!\u00a0 Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more, a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.\u00a0 We are all lost here on this rock, that goes around the sun without meaning.\u00a0 O lost, and by the wind grieved, ghost, come back again.\u00a0 I shall always be a borrower and that hurts too.\u00a0 Why can I not create in any medium?\u00a0 Why, why, why?\u00a0 Why am I so discouraged that I can’t work and don’t care about college or the future or anything?\u00a0 It all seems so hopeless.\u00a0 I wish I could go crazy or get sick or something.\u00a0 For a girl who wants to do everything all the way or not at all, it’s awfully frustrating to be continually forced into the middle.<\/p>\n
Yours in misery,<\/p>\n
Jenny<\/p>\n
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From the \u201cMimi\u201d journal.\u00a0 In my adolescence, I started writing a journal.\u00a0 I had read the Diary of Anne Frank, and copied her\u00a0idea of letters to an invisible friend.\u00a0 This was written in 1959 when I was 17. Thursday, 26 … Continue reading