(Written in January 2010)
\nWhen I got to Caryn\u2019s I went to my corner and collapsed, saying I was exhausted.\u00a0 Then a cranky person appeared.\u00a0 I sat up, saying I was angry, pounded on things.\u00a0 Caryn said \u201cWhat does your body want to do?\u201d Pound on things.\u00a0 I ended up throwing a punch with my right arm.\u00a0 \u201cSlow it down.\u201d When I did I found that my whole body was involved, legs and butt and left arm.\u00a0 There was a solid sense of satisfaction, of something landing and connecting.\u00a0 Then we sat on cushions facing each other so I could be properly supported.\u00a0 Feeling how the bones of the pelvis make a stable base.\u00a0 She suggested I imagine the stars overhead and that they were pulling me up.\u00a0 She told me that a woman she was working with spent some time with the altar and really liked my Jizo figure, and suggested I imagine\/feel the connection between us.\u00a0 What I felt\/saw was a delicate thread like a spider web that connected me to the Jizo.\u00a0 I realized I never imagined it going to connect with the woman herself.\u00a0 Caryn talked about the \u201cmatrix,\u201d the structure of space around me, that holds me up, and is filled with connections to other people.\u00a0 (I think of all the people I do the lovingkindness prayer for.) She talked about \u201ccore stability\u201d and we did an exercise where I lay on the floor with my legs on a cube, then push down with one and raise the other and see what that does in my abdomen.\u00a0 She put her hands below my waist to show me the muscles that tighten around the body, squeezing the spine to strengthen it and make it longer.\u00a0 She said a strong physical core helps create a strong psychological one.\u00a0 I can\u2019t always follow what she\u2019s saying, but I trust that my body understands.\u00a0 Then she suggested that I \u201croll and pour\u201d and get myself to standing and walk around.\u00a0 The cranky one said \u201cno\u201d so I rolled off the mat.\u00a0 The floor was slippery so I stretched out my legs, and then my knees swung around to the other side and I found it easy to sit up.\u00a0 Big surprise!\u00a0 How effortless it was.\u00a0 We talked about it.\u00a0 I think what\u2019s happening is the \u201ctough little drip\u201d who used to soldier on, has decided to put her stubbornness into refusing to soldier on.<\/p>\n
Caryn McHose<\/a> is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner in Holderness, NH<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" (Written in January 2010) When I got to Caryn\u2019s I went to my corner and collapsed, saying I was exhausted.\u00a0 Then a cranky person appeared.\u00a0 I sat up, saying I was angry, pounded on things.\u00a0 Caryn said \u201cWhat does your … Continue reading