{"id":2837,"date":"2012-06-30T09:58:12","date_gmt":"2012-06-30T13:58:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/?p=2837"},"modified":"2012-10-15T11:34:41","modified_gmt":"2012-10-15T15:34:41","slug":"ereshkigal","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/?p=2837","title":{"rendered":"June 1993: Ereshkigal"},"content":{"rendered":"

(Written in June of 1993, in\u00a0 Writers Group: a guided meditation, I can’t remember now if it was something I read out loud, or something that was on a tape.)
\nI was on a mountainside, by a stream, a view out over wide plains, very tall trees on the other side.\u00a0 I follow the path over the shoulder of the mountain and come to a narrow rocky ravine.\u00a0 The cave is between two bastions of rock, it’s hard to get to, and narrows quickly.\u00a0 Soon I have to crawl, but I’m also aware of points of gold light, so though I feel a little claustrophobic I’m willing to stay there.\u00a0 Raccoon comes to me in the darkness and leads me to a place where the cave gets wider, and is lit with an unearthly radiance.\u00a0 The light is cool and bright, coming from every direction, not like daylight.\u00a0 I see a bright figure on a petaled throne.\u00a0 It is Inanna<\/a>, she is quite beautiful and so bright that I can hardly see her.\u00a0 She has smooth dark skin, like an Indian.\u00a0 But when I ask if she is my guide, she takes my hand and leads me to Ereshkigal<\/a>.\u00a0 Ereshkigal I couldn’t see very well, she was dark and gnarled, I would say ugly, but I couldn’t see well enough to tell.
\nWhy have you come to me at this time?\u00a0 \u2014 So you will know the pain and rage of the buried sister.
\nWhat do you require of me?\u00a0 \u2014 Honesty.
\nWhat more is required for me to become fully engaged with this process?\u00a0 \u2014Listen carefully.\u00a0 I am not very articulate so I must stumble for words.\u00a0 If it were a painting there would be a fine gold line dividing two enormous darknesses, like the cave that you entered.\u00a0 You must go into the darkness to find the light.
\nNo, Damn, I’m willing to listen, but this all sounds like the most godawful platitudes.\u00a0 I know the pain and rage of the buried sister.\u00a0 Surely there’s something more here, something I’m missing.\u00a0 What do you really have to say to me?
\n\u2014Something about the power of anger, how to use it correctly, how to burn up what should be burned.\u00a0 You were angry at your friend today for whining.\u00a0 Correct use, correct use.\u00a0 “That’s what it costs” you said.\u00a0 That’s what I say to you, that’s what it costs, that’s what it costs to live.\u00a0 It’s hard to be yourself, to really be authentic, to stand for yourself against all the pressures telling you that you’re wrong, crazy, isolated, sinful, selfish.\u00a0 Selfish, by god \u2014 yes I say be selfish, be authentic self.\u00a0 Jesus didn’t die on the cross so you could be Jesus-clone, he died so you could be Jenny.\u00a0 You must pay the price to be Jenny.\u00a0 The price is poor health and lack of understanding from society, the price is that many people will not notice you, and many others will be threatened, still others will be jealous and try to tear you down.\u00a0 The reward is great depth of perception, great power in expressing what you see, and the glorious moments of bringing through a truth from the shamanic world.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The price is self-doubt, and conflict, a struggle to keep your balance among the great spinning wheels, constant effort to see truly, rejection of easy answers.\u00a0 The reward is the satisfaction of encountering truth: bone-hard, bone-deep.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(Written in June of 1993, in\u00a0 Writers Group: a guided meditation, I can’t remember now if it was something I read out loud, or something that was on a tape.) I was on a mountainside, by a stream, a view … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,9,18],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2837","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-guidance","category-journal","category-ritual-year"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2837","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2837"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2837\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2837"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2837"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2837"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}