{"id":1825,"date":"2011-09-05T09:39:42","date_gmt":"2011-09-05T13:39:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/?p=1825"},"modified":"2011-09-05T09:39:42","modified_gmt":"2011-09-05T13:39:42","slug":"guidance-51","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/?p=1825","title":{"rendered":"Guidance"},"content":{"rendered":"

(Written in October 2003)
\nDear Spirits, I\u2019m so angry at myself for creating all this misery.\u00a0 Please help me!\u00a0 Please!
\n\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Dear Jenny, you are being much too hard on yourself.\u00a0 This is why you really need a spiritual community \u2014 it is just too hard to do this work all by yourself, and too easy to fall into this horrible tight spiral of trying too hard and making yourself wrong.\u00a0 Dear Jenny, we love you very much.\u00a0 We are all around you holding out our love.\u00a0 It\u2019s OK to collapse completely, it\u2019s OK to stop struggling to be better than you are.\u00a0 You are doing just fine, stumbling around, getting the bills paid, making mistakes, being unable to get yourself up off the floor.\u00a0 You need a break.\u00a0 Something completely different like running downtown with the mail & then take the dog for a little walk\u00a0 \u2014 a minimal walk is OK.<\/em><\/p>\n

Did that.\u00a0 Felt scared the whole walk.\u00a0 I\u2019m so sad to be unable to enjoy a beautiful day like today.\u00a0 At least I was able to enjoy my two walks yesterday.\u00a0 At one point I looked at the fear and tried to understand what it\u2019s trying to tell me \u2014 at which it vanished, and now I feel sad and vulnerable and precarious.\u00a0 Perhaps I\u2019m scared because I\u2019m refusing to listen to my feelings of sadness and vulnerability.\u00a0 And I\u2019m feeling lonely.
\nWhat do I need?\u00a0 I need to enjoy the little things of daily life, I need emotional safety, I need to make heart-connections with friends.<\/p>\n

Feeling pretty bummed out.\u00a0 Driving back from town it was feeling like Brunswick and Cincinnati, places I used to live but don\u2019t live there any more \u2014 don\u2019t feel at home anywhere.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(Written in October 2003) Dear Spirits, I\u2019m so angry at myself for creating all this misery.\u00a0 Please help me!\u00a0 Please! \u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0Dear Jenny, you are being much too hard on yourself.\u00a0 This is why you really need a spiritual community … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1825","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-depression","category-guidance"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1825","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1825"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1825\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1825"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1825"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1825"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}