{"id":1361,"date":"2011-04-16T11:22:00","date_gmt":"2011-04-16T15:22:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/?p=1361"},"modified":"2011-04-16T11:22:00","modified_gmt":"2011-04-16T15:22:00","slug":"work-with-focusing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/?p=1361","title":{"rendered":"Work with Focusing"},"content":{"rendered":"

(Written in March 2011)
\nLynelle had a new book on Focusing, (The Power of Focusing by Ann Cornell<\/a>) written by a woman who\u2019d studied with Eugene Gendlin and gone on to teach lots of classes.\u00a0 So she\u2019s developed the technique into a fine art of getting to connect and converse with inner knowing.\u00a0 I\u2019ve been trying to use it with the fear, but it\u2019s not working.\u00a0 I think I\u2019m trying too hard.\u00a0 I imagine if I say \u201cHello\u201d to it the way she suggests it will fade or change, so I\u2019m really trying to make it go away.\u00a0 Of course that doesn\u2019t work.\u00a0 I wonder if I could work with the next layer, the one who wants it to go away.\u00a0 I immediately hear a burst of words: \u201cI want to have a life!\u00a0 I\u2019m sick and tired of being disabled by this low-grade fear!\u00a0 I wish it would go away!\u201d and while I write these thoughts down I feel warmth and strength in my belly.\u00a0 O yes, she\u2019s angry, and she\u2019s standing there, hands on hips, the angry 5-year-old and I just smile, I\u2019m glad to see her.\u00a0 \u201cYou haven\u2019t painted in a long time!\u201d she complains.\u00a0 I get an image of a grey stone shape labeled FEAR and then painting it out with red.\u00a0 Yes, maybe I can do that.\u00a0 But it\u2019s also true that the fear is part of me so I can\u2019t just make it go away.\u00a0 It\u2019s like a terrified baby, lying there screaming, and my integrity and compassion demand that I just sit here with it, let her know I\u2019m not going away.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m still here, I\u2019m not going to make you talk if you don\u2019t want to, and I\u2019m not going to abandon you.\u201d \u201cYou abandon me all the time!!\u201d \u201cI\u2019m sorry, that\u2019s true, but it\u2019s not my intention to abandon you, and if I do leave you, I\u2019ll always come back.\u201d
\nWrote more in my journal but I could still feel the frightened one.\u00a0 I thought of leaving her somewhere and got a panicked \u201cDon\u2019t leave me with her!\u201d meaning the 5-yr-old.\u00a0 I reassured her, asked about Mama Greene.\u00a0 Baby still felt scared.\u00a0 So then I said \u201cHow about if I carry you next to me in a Snugli kind of thing?\u201d I could feel her warmth & gratitude & love.\u00a0 I can feel it now.\u00a0 \u201cThere, there, dear, I\u2019ve got you.\u201d The 5-yr-old says \u201cWhat a wimp!\u201d I say \u201cI think you\u2019re jealous and you\u2019re welcome to come along on any adventures today.\u201d<\/p>\n

I made a Jizo with a clinging baby, a little how I feel my inner baby clinging to me.\u00a0 I put his arms around the baby and bent his head to look at it.\u00a0 I like the result. The thought of the baby clinging and being held is comforting.<\/p>\n

I had promised the 5-yr-old that I would paint so I went up to the studio.\u00a0 I\u00a0 squeezed out some black & white paint & covered two pieces of paper with sponged grey labeled \u201cFEAR\u201d.<\/p>\n

This was the start of a long period of feeling really great.\u00a0 I made another of the new style of Jizo, and I kept going with the grey fear painting.\u00a0 I taped the two pieces of paper together and covered them with sponged black & white.\u00a0 Then I spent some time making a stamp that said FEAR.\u00a0 After stamping FEAR all over the painting in both black and white, I started painting red flames coming up from the bottom and starting to cover all the grey.\u00a0 This ability to persist with a project is new and felt really good.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(Written in March 2011) Lynelle had a new book on Focusing, (The Power of Focusing by Ann Cornell) written by a woman who\u2019d studied with Eugene Gendlin and gone on to teach lots of classes.\u00a0 So she\u2019s developed the technique … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1361","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-healing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1361","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1361"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1361\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1361"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1361"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jennydeupree.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1361"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}