(Written in February 2010)<\/p>\n
Karen was a big help.\u00a0 I cried a lot and said how discouraged I was that I\u2019ve been working so long and so hard and I haven\u2019t gotten any better.\u00a0 Karen said I was a lot better, that healing happens by ups & downs, that I was in a healing process.\u00a0 She said I was scaring myself with stories of just getting worse, and that I was doing the thing of looking to see if I was better yet.\u00a0 She asked me how it felt in my body when I was feeling so hopeless and discouraged.\u00a0 It was hard to describe, especially when I wasn\u2019t in it any more: stiff, cold, heavy heart.\u00a0 I remembered about curling up with the baby and a blanket and listening to Nancy Napier when I was feeling bad.\u00a0 That\u2019s what I need, not to try to change myself to get out of the misery, but to comfort myself in the misery.\u00a0 We did letting go with the towel, and I said it\u2019s OK to let go, it\u2019s OK to not know what to do, it\u2019s OK to not do anything.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
(Written in February 2010) Karen was a big help.\u00a0 I cried a lot and said how discouraged I was that I\u2019ve been working so long and so hard and I haven\u2019t gotten any better.\u00a0 Karen said I was a lot … Continue reading