(Written in November 2008)
\nSession with Caryn.\u00a0 Several powerful experiences of relief and release \u2014 like confession and absolution.\u00a0 I told her about this recent period of \u201cretreat\u201d, of avoiding talking to my friends, staying in solitude, etc.\u00a0 Although I\u2019ve been oddly comfortable with it, there was at least one member of the committee judging me as \u201cselfish.\u201d Caryn reframed the whole thing, she said \u201cThis is HEALTH.\u201d She said I was taking space for myself, needed for the inner work to be done.\u00a0 I told her about the Montessori teacher\u2019s book, and the children who would run around the classroom, knocking over other children\u2019s projects.\u00a0 Caryn asked me to let that energy appear & play the Montessori teacher to myself.\u00a0 I realized immediately, she didn\u2019t want to hurt other children, but she did want to make a mess.\u00a0 \u201cHow does that feel in your body?\u201d So I told the child part of me about painting the Red Woman.\u00a0 Most of me was back \u201cin the zone\u201d with Aviva, but there was a little piece on my upper chest who still felt separate.\u00a0 She was soft & flat & sensitive.\u00a0 I said maybe this was a part brought back in this recent shamanic journey so of course she wasn\u2019t there when I painted the Red Woman.\u00a0 I also remembered the image of the children who\u2019d been in the tsunami knocking down towers of blocks as part of their healing.\u00a0 I told her how glad I was to have her back as part of me.\u00a0 Maybe that was when she integrated.
\nWhen I first went in, my corner had been dismantled so I chose to sit on a meditation cushion between the windows.\u00a0 I propped myself up \u2014 knee pillows as well \u2014 until I could sit comfortably.\u00a0 It felt wonderful.\u00a0 Caryn said \u201cYou\u2019ve never been fully supported.\u201d I cried.
\nWhen the work with the \u201cdestructive\u201d energy felt complete, I wanted to \u201cpour and roll\u201d so Caryn set up two mats and a rug and I rolled around on them.\u00a0 She talked about the \u201cpour and roll\u201d stage \u2014 I see I\u2019m going to have to read their book.<\/p>\n
Caryn and Kevin’s book is How Life Moves<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" (Written in November 2008) Session with Caryn.\u00a0 Several powerful experiences of relief and release \u2014 like confession and absolution.\u00a0 I told her about this recent period of \u201cretreat\u201d, of avoiding talking to my friends, staying in solitude, etc.\u00a0 Although I\u2019ve … Continue reading