I\u2019ve been keeping a journal for many years.\u00a0 I\u2019ve been writing every day for quite a while.\u00a0 It\u2019s part of my healing process.\u00a0 It can be very useful to go back and read what was happening a couple of years, or a couple of months ago.\u00a0 It usually gives me perspective, though there are times when I read about the good stuff and can\u2019t believe it, it sounds like someone else\u2019s life.\u00a0 I type up about half of what I write.\u00a0 For this blog, I\u2019ve picked out journal entries that I hope other people will find helpful.<\/p>\n
The entries have not been written on the day that they are posted.\u00a0 At first I was frustrated by this.\u00a0 I was imagining that chronological order would show a path of healing.\u00a0 But looking back over the last five years I see there have been many ups and downs.\u00a0 When I\u2019m feeling good, I imagine \u201cI\u2019m well now!\u201d and stop doing the things that were helping, meaning medication and therapy, with disastrous consequences.\u00a0 When I\u2019m feeling bad, it feels like it\u2019s always been that way and will always be that way \u2014 and I have to remind myself that \u201cforever\u201d is part of the chemistry of depression.\u00a0 Most of the time an entry saying “I’ve finally got there,\u00a0 I’m doing fine,”\u00a0 will be followed a few months later by one saying “I feel as horrible as I’ve ever felt…”<\/p>\n
Journal entry April 6, 2007
\nSecond cup of tea.\u00a0 Fire going better.\u00a0 Snow has stopped.\u00a0 Sky opening up in the west.\u00a0 To whom am I writing this report?\u00a0 To some great wise being who loves me and loves all the details of my life.\u00a0 So amazing.\u00a0 My heart grows warm and I have a sense of that being settling down next to me with an arm over my shoulders, and my shoulders feel warm.\u00a0 Thank you!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I\u2019ve been keeping a journal for many years.\u00a0 I\u2019ve been writing every day for quite a while.\u00a0 It\u2019s part of my healing process.\u00a0 It can be very useful to go back and read what was happening a couple of years, … Continue reading