Gate, Gate, Paragate…

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008)
When we came in for the afternoon session Gate Gate was playing.  I sat down in my place and began to sing along.  I imagined holding the traumatized baby in my lap — she had been with me pretty continuously since I had talked to Hugh (and done some intense crying) after the session ended at 11:30.  So I was sitting there holding her and singing and suddenly it came to me that she was dying, or maybe already dead.  I began to weep, but kept the singing going through my tears.  Then I thought about that time, over 20 years ago, when I had been here for the Inner Quest Intensive, and had lain on the floor and called out “I want to be loved” and a thunderous flood of love came down from the ceiling.  I thought about this and it happened again.  I had a sense of an infinitely kind face saying “we’ve been here all along.” I was able to allow the love to pour in to me and let it extend out to the infant in my lap.  I realized I didn’t know if she would be able to come back to life, or if she was dying, but I affirmed my intent to stay with her.  I also extended love and compassionate presence to all those who were dying alone right then.  It felt good, My heart felt eased and open and it lasted for a while.

Gate, gate, paragate, parasamgate, Bodhi, Svaha  is a Buddhist chant that means: gone, gone, gone beyond, gone beyond beyond, Awakening, rejoice.  The version we were listening to was done by Robbie Gass.

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