Category Archives: Journal

“Terrified” from July, 2015

I’ve been reading through my blog, and finding it encouraging.  So many times in the past when I was having a very hard time.  I can see that I’m doing much better now, despite the sense that something is lacking … Continue reading

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Positive Sense of Myself

This was initially posted on July 20, 2012.  It was named “Positive Self-Image.”  Some time ago I said something to my friend Beverly about trying to change my self-image.  She said “Self-image is like the weather,” and suggested that it … Continue reading

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Deep Surrender

From my journal.  At the end of March I had no definite diagnosis for the pain in my back which was making it very difficult to walk, bend down, lift anything heavy. Saturday, March 30 I’m sore all over. Nothing … Continue reading

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Positive Learnings from Being Immobilized

Looking back, I can see that the whole sequence cold —> cough —> back pain has given me time, space and motivation to see some good things about myself and my life. From my Journal for Saturday, February 16 It … Continue reading

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Siege of Poor Health & Bad Luck

On February 10 I got the bad cold that’s been going around.  I had it for two weeks.  Then I developed an endless cough.  The cold was over, and there wasn’t any infection.  The doctor prescribed an inhaler that’s used … Continue reading

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The Story of my Life that Works

From my journal for June 3, 1996 But the truth is, going over the whole thing in detail again again, writing down exactly what the fear feels like and then seeing how it matches my childhood, results in me feeling … Continue reading

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What is Gone?

I’ve been going to a writing group about loss.  I wrote this at the third meeting.  But it was a clumsy scramble, and brought up contradictions that I didn’t have time to explore.  I want to explore the whole process … Continue reading

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Really Doing OK Just as I Am

Tuesday, January 1 This morning I was thinking about a conversation with God, where I asked what I needed to do to fulfill “His” will, and God said “You’re doing fine just as you are,” and I said “No, I want … Continue reading

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Perspective on the Past

I went back and started reading my journal for 2018.  Found a lot that was very interesting. June 16, 2018 The talk with Erica was good. I have been really puzzling over why other people see what I am doing as … Continue reading

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“Should” versus My Inner Knowing

From my journal for June 17, 1993 Trajectory broken again. My flight of the last couple of days ends in a crash. Once again feeling anxious and scared, wanting to hide. I retreated into typing my journals, and the first glider plane went … Continue reading

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