Category Archives: Journal

Still Metabolizing a Profound Experience

I haven’t posted in a long time.  I’ve been continuing to process “Nights of Grief and Mystery,” and finding it very difficult to describe.  Both the event itself, and how it changed me.  I realize it’s going to take some time, … Continue reading

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“World Order of Planet Savers”

Thursday, October 24 Talk with a friend who insists that we were better off now than in the past.  She talked about the great plagues, and serfs, and people being killed for sport.  I wanted to say that we were … Continue reading

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Early Writings

Friday, September 27 Forgot to write that yesterday, in the middle of everything else — or maybe it was the day before — I got out some of my journal binders and started reading from the very first pieces.  I … Continue reading

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Needing to make things safe for the baby

From my journal for September 23 Thinking about trying to tell my insistent friend why I can’t just switch to eating Vegan when I agree that it’s best for the planet, best for the animals.  I’ve been struggling to understand … Continue reading

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There is no Planet B

3rd cup.  I see that the killing of the planet is what’s making looking at my own life and death be more meaningful than struggling to get my taxes done.  It makes everything I have to do to keep going … Continue reading

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Regrets

Gregory Hoskins: I’m gonna take a little walk through them fields, I’m gonna carry me gently so my heart can heal I’m gonna find me a demon, in a dark dark wood You can’t come with me. I wish you … Continue reading

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Struggle and Confusion

I have been having a very hard time for the last couple of weeks.  I got Stephen Jenkinson’s book Die Wise, and have been reading it slowly.  A lot of thought-provoking ideas.  I think I started to go down when … Continue reading

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Looking Straight at the Ending of my Life

My friend Elizabeth sent me a link to a talk by Stephen Jenkinson.  It didn’t do much for me, so I didn’t follow it up.  More recently she sent me a link to a short film about Nights of Grief … Continue reading

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The Arctic is Burning, the Amazon is Burning

I spent some time last week being totally freaked out about global warming.  Through some synchronicities (see previous post) I was helped to understand how it related to my childhood trauma of being abandoned by my mother.  The panic subsided, … Continue reading

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Struggle to understand why I’ve been so freaked out…

I haven’t posted for a while because I’ve been having a very hard time.  The usual brain not working, often feeling shaky and weak, feeling burdened by so many unresolved things, unable to think what to do next, finding it … Continue reading

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