Category Archives: Healing

Big Life Change

The first step was feeling totally helpless and needing to have someone come rescue me, but then being able to just witness that I was “at the end of my resources,” without trying to figure out what I could do … Continue reading

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Saying “No”

Wednesday, September 28 The session with Erica was very painful.  I cried a lot.  I didn’t write anything down.  I didn’t feel connected to her.  It was hard to say how I knew that.  I said something about how her … Continue reading

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Mandala of Truth

This is a piece I wrote during the Kindred Spirits gathering at Rowe.  I did this workshop with about 10 other people.  It was facilitated by Satyena who is the director of Starseed. Yesterday I did Satyena’s workshop “Mandala of … Continue reading

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Kendal Retirement Community

I have mentioned Kendal several times, but never said much about it. I started having a really hard time after Bella died in September 2013.  Lynelle warned me that it would trigger abandonment issues and it certainly did.  I started … Continue reading

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The “Tough Little Drip” Revisited

Friday, September 29 Woke with headache and heart burning. Yesterday was actually pretty good.  I felt OK when I woke up and had a great talk with Elizabeth.  I was telling her about the painful session with Erica and she … Continue reading

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Pain Becomes Compassion

I was typing up from a month ago when I had woken up feeling sad & scared, and was so disappointed that I had lost the good feelings from the day before.  I was angry at myself for “wrecking” my … Continue reading

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I Feel Pain Because I Love

Last Saturday I didn’t have any human contact all day.  I typed a lot of journal, played a lot of solitaire.  Washed a bunch of dishes.  Dumped a puzzle on the table & started turning pieces right side up.  I … Continue reading

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Grandmother Patches

We were going to do a “Grandmother Ceremony” at Neskaya in May.  One of our dancer/teachers was going to be 70 this May, so she spent a lot of time putting together the event.  Alas, two of the four of … Continue reading

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Being Present to the Beauty of Nature

For a long time, because of trying to heal PTSD, and opening up all the pain I have been dissociated from, I was unable to enjoy the beauty of Nature as I had when I was younger.  Things are changing. … Continue reading

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My Life is Worthwhile

Feeling pretty good this morning.  (!)  I think it’s from the realization that my life, just as it is, is worthwhile.  It’s hard, but I don’t mind hard if I’m doing something meaningful.  A job worth doing.  Before doing the … Continue reading

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