Category Archives: Trauma

Grief for my Old Life

Last week I was diagnosed with macular degeneration.  It is the leading cause of blindness in people over 60.  It can proceed at different rates.  They told me that an intense dose of vitamins could help, so I got some … Continue reading

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“World Order of Planet Savers”

Thursday, October 24 Talk with a friend who insists that we were better off now than in the past.  She talked about the great plagues, and serfs, and people being killed for sport.  I wanted to say that we were … Continue reading

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Looking at Jenny from Outside

I have been struggling with the question of whether I “love” life.  It’s something Stephen Jenkinson talks about, something that can become very strong when you realize that you are really going to die.  I hear people say they love … Continue reading

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Early Writings

Friday, September 27 Forgot to write that yesterday, in the middle of everything else — or maybe it was the day before — I got out some of my journal binders and started reading from the very first pieces.  I … Continue reading

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Needing to make things safe for the baby

From my journal for September 23 Thinking about trying to tell my insistent friend why I can’t just switch to eating Vegan when I agree that it’s best for the planet, best for the animals.  I’ve been struggling to understand … Continue reading

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There is no Planet B

3rd cup.  I see that the killing of the planet is what’s making looking at my own life and death be more meaningful than struggling to get my taxes done.  It makes everything I have to do to keep going … Continue reading

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Regrets

Gregory Hoskins: I’m gonna take a little walk through them fields, I’m gonna carry me gently so my heart can heal I’m gonna find me a demon, in a dark dark wood You can’t come with me. I wish you … Continue reading

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Struggle and Confusion

I have been having a very hard time for the last couple of weeks.  I got Stephen Jenkinson’s book Die Wise, and have been reading it slowly.  A lot of thought-provoking ideas.  I think I started to go down when … Continue reading

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Looking Straight at the Ending of my Life

My friend Elizabeth sent me a link to a talk by Stephen Jenkinson.  It didn’t do much for me, so I didn’t follow it up.  More recently she sent me a link to a short film about Nights of Grief … Continue reading

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Developmental Trauma Disorder

In working on a previous post about developmental trauma disorder, I came across this paper by Bessel van der Kolk, who I consider the world’s foremost expert in trauma.  Therapists who work with traumatized people have been trying to get “developmental … Continue reading

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