Category Archives: Guidance

Bleak and Dark Inside

From my journal for October 2003 I’ve been writing and run out of things to say.  I’ve finished my tea.  I don’t want to move and I need to go on with my day.  There there Jenny, what you are … Continue reading

Posted in Depression, Guidance | Comments Off on Bleak and Dark Inside

Struggle with Emptiness/Meaninglessness

This was written on October 11, which happens to be my mother’s birthday. She died fifteen years ago. Woke feeling scared — tried asking it but nothing happened.  Tried bringing compassion to it, sitting next to it — no softening, … Continue reading

Posted in Depression, Guidance, Trauma | Comments Off on Struggle with Emptiness/Meaninglessness

Trying to Work with Fear

I’ve been reading my journal for 2003.  For several years I had just been typing up the guidance writings, but in 2003 I started typing up more from my life.  This was written in October 2003 Feeling so sad about … Continue reading

Posted in Depression, Guidance | Comments Off on Trying to Work with Fear

What it’s like to live with PTSD

This is a series of journal entries from June 2016.  I think it gives an immediate sense of what my life is like. Driving home it was a glorious day, blue sky, white clouds, green trees, enough breeze to make … Continue reading

Posted in Depression, Guidance, Journal, Trauma | Comments Off on What it’s like to live with PTSD

Guidance

I don’t know when I stopped asking my Guides and Guardian Spirits for guidance.  I didn’t stop consciously for some reason, I just stopped and only realized it when a lot of time had gone by.  Recently I was with friends, … Continue reading

Posted in Guidance, Journal, Present Day, Spirit | Comments Off on Guidance

Words for Survival

It was 1996, the Summer from Hell.  In February I had tried Paxil for 5 days while my terror shot through the roof & got worse & worse until the 5th night when I didn’t sleep at all.  So I … Continue reading

Posted in Breakdown, Guidance, Journal, Trauma, Writing | Comments Off on Words for Survival

Here is the Plan…

This is a piece of writing I did in Writers for Recovery.  “Show up,” and “Pay attention” are from Angeles Arrien’s Rules for Life. Here is the plan: First, do not turn on the Computer Do not read emails Do … Continue reading

Posted in Guidance, Healing, Present Day, Spirit, Story, Writing | Comments Off on Here is the Plan…

Conversations with “God”

Feeling sad.  Ask God for help.  My brother Jack talked about asking god about everything.  He talked about keeping doing it until it starts to work.  AA’s Big Book talked about “God” as an inner resource, a completely different way … Continue reading

Posted in Guidance, Present Day, Spirit | Comments Off on Conversations with “God”

AA and Therapy

My brother, who is a recovering alcoholic, came to visit recently.  It was a great visit.  He has seven years of sobriety, and it makes me feel really good to see how much he’s changed his life.  We read some … Continue reading

Posted in Guidance, Healing, Present Day | 2 Comments

Trying to Love Myself

This came on the Daily Good: Love After Love The time will come when, with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror and each will smile at the other’s welcome, and say, sit … Continue reading

Posted in Guidance, Present Day, Spirit | Comments Off on Trying to Love Myself