Category Archives: Present Day

Guidance

Dear Guides & Guardian Spirits, I have been having a confusing time with this new part that’s waked up in me.  It seems clear that integrating her is my job for now.  But I’m uncertain.  I’m afraid it’s too “self-involved.”  … Continue reading

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A New Part of Me

I haven’t posted for a while, because I’ve been having serious trouble verbalizing my experience.  It’s been about developing a relationship with a very early fragment of myself.  It started with recognizing that the non-verbal, scared experience that I’ve been … Continue reading

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Blind Terror

What a strange experience.  I’m not even sure I can write about it accurately.  I thought my brain had stopped working.  I was afraid it had to do with getting old.  Erica reframed it as a stage in spiritual growth, … Continue reading

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Stunted Tree

I have just been to a retreat in Burlington.  Winter Wonder: A Circle of Trust Retreat.  It was quite wonderful and helped a lot with the emptiness and confusion I’ve been feeling.  “Circle of Trust” is based on the work … Continue reading

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Turnaround in the Pit

I’ve been feeling like a combination of the Dan Siegel material, the diagnosis of macular degeneration, and reading my early journals brought me to a place where I feel beyond redemption.  I think of this as the Pit, a deep … Continue reading

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Spending Time at the Bottom of the Pit

Friday morning, November 29, I watched a Dan Siegel talk on “Presence, Parenting, and Planet.”  It was great.  It was easy to see why I’ve had such a struggle.  Neither Mom nor Dad was capable of being present.  I was … Continue reading

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Grief for my Old Life

Last week I was diagnosed with macular degeneration.  It is the leading cause of blindness in people over 60.  It can proceed at different rates.  They told me that an intense dose of vitamins could help, so I got some … Continue reading

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Seeing my Life Whole

from my journal for November 11 On the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month, the Great War came to an end.  But the war in Afghanistan is still going on. and it’s just part of the … Continue reading

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Still Metabolizing a Profound Experience

I haven’t posted in a long time.  I’ve been continuing to process “Nights of Grief and Mystery,” and finding it very difficult to describe.  Both the event itself, and how it changed me.  I realize it’s going to take some time, … Continue reading

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“World Order of Planet Savers”

Thursday, October 24 Talk with a friend who insists that we were better off now than in the past.  She talked about the great plagues, and serfs, and people being killed for sport.  I wanted to say that we were … Continue reading

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