Category Archives: Breakdown

“This is the Work for Now”

Dialogue between Jenny of now and Jenny in the hospital.  I was afraid the hospital Jenny would be uncomfortable with her much older self, and even with almost any adult.  I decided to be a “Great Aunt,” and couldn’t find … Continue reading

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Breakdown in Davis

I’ve mentioned the breakdown in Davis more than once, but never told the whole story.  My good friend Kathi moved to Davis to go to Nursing School, and I followed her.  The environmental movement was just gearing up — it … Continue reading

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Guidance

(Written in February 2009) Dear Guides and Guardian Spirits, I’m feeling very lost and confused.  I’ve no idea what happened to me, why I’ve collapsed so badly.  I’ve no idea what to do except follow Dr. Seigle’s program for medication … Continue reading

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Guidance

(Written in January 2009) Dear Guides & Guardian Spirits, I’m having a pretty hard time just getting through the day.  Can you help me? Dear Jenny, you are doing just fine.  You are doing the work that you need to … Continue reading

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Last Day of Retreat

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008) Last day.  I can’t say I’m glad to go home — I’m actually scared.  I guess that’s another warning to me that I do need to find medication that works.  One possible resource … Continue reading

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Gate, Gate, Paragate…

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008) When we came in for the afternoon session Gate Gate was playing.  I sat down in my place and began to sing along.  I imagined holding the traumatized baby in my lap — … Continue reading

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Totally Bleak

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008) At least I slept.  Feeling totally bleak this morning.  It was so painful yesterday, not to be able to feel any softening in my heart as I heard people’s stories of compassion, not … Continue reading

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Little Jenny

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008) I had a talk with Little Jenny.  I told her that her mother was mean to her because she was jealous of Little Jenny’s authenticity.  That she herself was hurting and avoiding feeling … Continue reading

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Connecting with Others

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008) Long talk with Patty who sits next to me and was my walking and breathing partner. She was the youngest of 6 in a severely disfunctional family.  She can remember what happened, but … Continue reading

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Help for Being Stuck

(At Kripalu with Jack Kornfield, December 2008) I realize that just through doing the meditation I’ve begun to tease apart the tangled feelings in my heart and am also beginning to feel more strong and clear about what to do … Continue reading

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